About 3 years ago, I finally managed to do the impossible. I lost weight going from 242lbs to a healthy 163. How I did it doesn't seem too hard; count calories and move more. Yet for some reason, it was the hardest thing I've ever done. After I established an exercise and healthy eating regiment, losing and maintaining weight was easy. I felt confident, motivated, and wonderful as I strutted my stuff in short dresses and bathing suits for the first time. However, 3 months ago, everything changed. I was diagnosed with mononucleosis which came with an inflamed liver and kidneys. My doctor told me I needed to stop working out, and start relaxing more. The fatigue I felt was intense and I stopped preparing meals in favor of takeout and snacks. I justified these unhealthy eating choices while sick and vowed to go back to my healthy lifestyle when things got better.
Instead, things got worse. I managed to catch ailments like pokémon: COVID, bronchitis, concussion, broken nose. I was miserable, depressed and slowly turning into a Jigglypuff. I turned to emotional eating as an escape. My vegetable drawers became barren as the cupboards burst with sweet and salty snacks. My depression grew stronger as I felt weak and pathetic over my lack of self-control. My doctor prescribed more antidepressants and I turned to therapy which put me further into medical debt as my high deductible plan had me paying for everything out of pocket. Today, I'm on the "I'll start next week" plan. I'll buy healthier foods next week when I go grocery shopping. I'll start going to the gym next week when the weather is better. Unfortunately, the only thing I'm losing is weeks. It took three months to abandon all healthy habits and gain 15 pounds. I want to go back to the way things were. My head is screaming at me to just do it. Just count calories and move more. It really shouldn't be this hard.
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source https://www.reddit.com/r/loseit/comments/11pum3t/i_have_lost_all_control/
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