Hello Im just kind of here to ramble. Korean. 21M. 5`7. 218lbs (99kg). so if some of my sentences sounds awkward (especially in the military language) or bad spelling or grammar bothers you, just keep in mind that English is not my native language. I don`t even expect you guys to read all of this mumbo jumbo. I just needed to vent and need some tips from you guys. TL;DR and question in the bottom
I was never an exercise guy. I used to walk and cycle a lot but only as a means of transportation. I`ve lived my whole life as a fat kid, and I didn`t mind it when i was a teenager. I disgusted working out. I used to weigh 240. however, since I had to enlist in the army, I was kind of scared and started to get some personal training before joining the army. Long story short, I lost about 20lbs then gained 15lbs before the army thing. pathetic I know.
Obviously, I always felt like i was dragging my squad?/platoon? down in the boot camp. There`s a squad just made out of fat soilders in Korean boot camp since almost everyone has to join them. (we call them pig platoon/squad), and I felt like I was lowest of the lowest. this really motivated me. I never wanted to quit or left behind, so I worked really hard. I did lose some weight, but this isn`t anime. I was still in the lower end, but I still wanted to keep lose my weight for my own sake. So i did just that.
Compared to my weight just before the whole military life, I had lost 35 pounds in the span of 4 months, and maintained it for quite a long time. I didn`t abhor exercise then. I just hated it, but not hate enough to stop exercise, which is a big step up in my opinion. Then corona happened. we`re stuck in the army, no visits and we always had to wear our mask even when working out. this is where my first passing out comes in. See, I ran 3km (1.8 miles) after our daily routine was over. and it always broke me. I would collapse and barely I MEAN BARELY catch my breath. People around me told me to not over do it but my trainer used to make me workout like this so this must have been the correct way right? Anyway now that I HAD to wear my mask while running or else i`ll be punished, it was a lot harder for me to run the same way. but I still did or at least tried because I`m stupid piece of shit. so yeah I passed out while running for about 4~5 min before I was found by one of my superior and was in little trouble. Commander told me to 'take it easy'. This little incident kind of made me scared of working out and made me think "yeah, I`ve done this enough, I deserve some break".
Unfortunately, I took that break a bit too much. I started to eat a lot and didn`t workout since there was no way too relieve my stress. No vacations remember? and No. Working out never made me feel good or feel content. it made me hate myself and only thing that kept me fueled was an anger. Maybe it`s because of my depression? Like I thought my overweight body made me feel depressed but maybe my depression made me overweight? idk idc. So again Long story short, gained like 22lbs by the time my duty was done. great.
after 5 month? here i am 21M. 5`7. 218lbs (99kg) Korean trying to start working out again. I heard <Ring Fit Adventure> is a great game for beginner like me so i started playing it. this was yesterday. I passed out again for 6~7 minutes while beating the lv.1 boss. At least the first time i passed out I was with someone else, but this time i was home alone and no one could have saved me. I`m sure i`m just overreacting but this really scared me. this was what.... 15 min workout? You might be saying "wow even for you that`s pathetic.". It is but hear me out.
I think my problem is I don`t know how to stop and take a break during and after workout. Since my first workout was with a trainer, All I had to care about was good posture. He told me when to take a break and when to pick things up. I just did what he told me to do. But now that he`s not around me to tell me what to do, im completely lost and give my maximum effort all the time. the 15 min workout that made me pass out? I basically speedran it while giving my absolute everything. then why don`t i not do that? If i can walk or raise my arm after exercising, it feels like i`ve wasted my time and didn`t actually workout. I always doubt myself. "What if i`m just making excuses?" "What if I`m just taking the easy way around?" oh you don`t feel pain after todays workout? you fat piece of shit that`s why everyone around you hates you. you give up way too easily." So I workout really hard to the point of passing out. I know this kind of sound like humble bragging, but it`s really not. This kind of attitude makes working out unsustainable and seriously discourages me from exercise, and that makes me hate myself even more. so to make my broken brain make a little bit of more endorphins I eat, which makes me fat, which makes me hate myself even more. you guys probably know the rest of the story. but that a whole different story. I want to stop pushing myself too hard and actually make exercising sustainable.
TL;DR I passed out twice while working out, because I don`t know when or how to stop effectively, and always doubt myself.
Q.How should I take a break mid-workout effectively
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source https://www.reddit.com/r/loseit/comments/nwb10u/so_i_just_passed_out_while_working_out_for_the/
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