I'm especially self-conscious around the holidays. People take pictures with me and post them on IG/Facebook and I get to see how much of a fat guy I'm becoming and getting even fatter with every month that passes.
I hardly interact with anyone anymore due to my weight. I feel like hell and wear baggy clothes that mentally make me feel like I'm hiding my belly and man-tits.
When I look at pictures of myself, I immediately get this sickening pit in my stomach, almost paralyzing me. I actually despise my body.
I don't know how much more motivation I need to lose weight. I don't know how many times I've tried and failed. After a few days of feeling shitty about myself, I just return to normal and eat whatever I want, pretending like I won't gain any more weight.
I've lost 50 pounds in the past and I felt so happy about myself. I don't know how the fuck I managed to put it all back on, but even if I could possibly lose all of my weight twice, I'd never be able to maintain it.
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source https://www.reddit.com/r/loseit/comments/rqw38w/how_fat_do_i_have_to_get/
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