A couple of years ago, my mom had gastric bypass surgery and lost over 100 lbs. She became smaller than me while I was in HS. Ever since then, the body-shaming is constant. I've been body-shamed by her all my life, but it got more intense. She'll tell friends, family, and even strangers about how big and unhealthy I am. It's embarrassing and I don't want to leave my room sometimes. Her friends will call her out on this, yet she doesn't really care.
Now I'm 19, and due to quarantine, I hit the weight that my mom was when she was her biggest. This killed me. I was scared that she was going to find out. She did at a doctor's appointment and she told me that I need to lose weight immediately by going to the gym with her and eat salads. I went to the gym with her once and ate salads for a short amount of time.
The issue is what my Mom brings into the house. She loves shopping and sales. So, every time she goes shopping for groceries, she buys so much food. 90% unhealthy and the rest is fruit. She'll make a frozen pizza for me and my brother then put us down for eating it. And she will buy/cook healthier meals only for herself and gets mad if I eat some. My mom does cook for me and my brother and it's usually not really healthy. She'll make enough spaghetti for 20 people and expects us to eat it in a week. It doesn't help that she will buy candy, chips, and soda on sale. Wouldn't it be cheaper to not buy it at all?
On top of that, my Mom has this habit of getting rid of clothes that's too big on her by putting them in my closet. Since she's a shopaholic, I get a lot of clothes this way. But just because it's big on her, it doesn't mean it will fit me. I will try these clothes on and she will ridicule my body and make me feel bad.
When I do attempt to diet or lose some weight, my mom will make comments about how I'm going to fail or she will just laugh at me.
It frustrating how my mom pretends to be a health expert when her actions contradict everything she tells me. How can she give me the advice to lose weight naturally when she didn't even do that? My mom isn't even a healthy weight. And the only reason that she doesn't overeat is because she'll throw up or get dizzy if she does.
I lost motivation to do anything for the past couple of months. I don't talk to anyone or go out at all anymore. I binge food all the time, have no sort of discipline or self-control. I hate myself. I really need to lose weight.
How can I do so in this environment? I'm going to college soon. Will that help? Does my mom really want me to lose weight or does she just like being better than me?
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source https://www.reddit.com/r/loseit/comments/ozqdlf/this_feels_like_a_setup/
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