Okay so, looking back I was pretty skinny fat kid, everyone has told me I looked anorexic this was around grades 3-7 or something like that, bullying got bad around grade 8 so I ate junk a lot from grades 8-10.
In grade 11 this new girl showed up In high school and because i thought I was ugly, I somewhat starved myself or calorie deficit, I basically ran 5k everyday and only ate chicken,rice and cheese and junk from time to time, but hey it honestly worked.
Then I started going to the gym everyday and doing strong lifts in the summer going into 12 and basically throughout grade 12 I was pretty skinny and happy, then slowly I stopped going to the gym and gained a little of it back but not enough where I hated myself, I was probably like in the range of 130-156 or something. So not horrible but slowly and slowly i got heavier and then when I get with my now ex, we ate junk food everyday and I mean everyday.
I got up to 195 pounds and I hated myself and thought I was so ugly, now that’s she’s gone my body I guess just naturally lost weight( I do walk like 5k a day and still eat junk but eat less overall food( I’m not starving myself) and drink more water.) so I’m 180 and someone told me today I have a little beer belly, my jawline isn’t great and that’s unfortunate.
I’m not great at dieting, but I try to eat a calorie deficit, I’m leaving for college in a month and I don’t wanna get that heavy again and or starve myself, I just have this crippling fear if I lose weight I’ll gain it all back again
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source https://www.reddit.com/r/loseit/comments/oy697g/im_scared_that_if_i_lose_weight_again_ill_gain_it/
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