I've been in bad shape for years now. My weight just kept climbing and I'm currently at 105kg. My goal weight has been 80kg for 2 whole years now. Hell, I'd even be happy if i made it to 90, but I've just been stuck at this weight.
I've been trying to do CICO. Every month, i have maybe a week when things go well and i stay within my allocated calories, and i feel great about it but then i mess it all up other weeks. The lowest I've gotten over the last few months has been 100kg, but never for long.
I know what my problems are: - I order in too much, and whenever i do, i end up overeating - I've gotten into this bad habit of always wanting to something to eat if I'm watching tv. Usually it ends up being potato chips or some other junk. I've tried to break that association multiple times but i keep going back to it - Not being able to exercise consistently. I've noticed on days i exercise, i also eat well. But thats been tough. Going to the gym has been tricky because i have to go at odd hours when I know theres not going to be a lot of people there (trying to stay safe from COVID as much as i can). I also try to run every now and then, but that really depends on the weather. Its been a little chilly over the past few months, and if i run when the air is chilly, my lungs get messed up and i cough a lot (i have a mild asthma). - If anything in my schedule gets messed up, so do my eating habits. I find that i eat well on weekdays because theres a structure to the days, but on weekends its a free-for-all and i will find myself making all sorts of bad decisions
I dont know what the purpose of this post is. I'm just feeling terrible about myself. I'm disappointed and upset and feeling hopeless. I hate my body right now and want to feel better about it. I want to be able to run more easily, or at the very least not feel totally out of breath when doing simple tasks like walking to the grocery store. Hell, i just want to fit comfortably in airplane seats. But all that seems impossible.
Thanks for listening to my rant.
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source https://www.reddit.com/r/loseit/comments/m4q7pz/i_am_so_angry_and_upset_at_myself_and_im_losing/
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