Young, fat and successful

Here we go again. This is my first post on reddit! So thank you for reading!

I've put on weight. Again. But this time it's more and much worse. I've become numb to the number. 190, 195, 200, 205 and tonight 208.8. I'm 5'7 and 26.

I'm stressed. New job. Big job. It's a pandemic. I'll deal with it eventually. But will eventually come? I feel exhausted before I've actually started. I've done this dance many times. It always starts and ends the same.

I dig deep and find the motivation to loose weight. I start a strict but realistic meal plan. I find a new workout regime. Last year it was heavy lifting. Before that it was beachbody. Running a marathon. And it always works.

I'm good at goals. I'm good at 150%.

I lose 20, 30 or 40 pounds and look amazing. I'm fit. I'm toned. I'm beautiful.

And then one day I stop working out every day. I stop watching everything I eat. I eat that cookie. I drink that beer. And before I know it I'm up 10. 10 becomes 15. I avoid weighing myself because denial is easier than the truth. Woops, up 20. Now 30.

Well, today it's become 38.8 pounds. I'm the heaviest I've ever been in my adult like and am the executive director of my company at 26. I have one pair of pants that fit and feel like crap.

I'm happy but overweight and feel no motivation to lose weight again. I'm tired of the story. I'm tired of the formula. I've struggled with weight since I was 10. I've never learned balance. I've never learned to just have 1 cookie.

The problem is to lose weight I have to be strict and I never learned moderation. I've never been able to lose without watching every bit of food I eat. It consumes my mind. I have to focus everything on losing weight.

But I have a new obsession, my job.

I love it and I'm good at it and I want to give 150%. But how do I give 150% to both?

Help. Reddit world help me discover the secret to the universe and how to lose weight and change my lifestyle and still work at a demanding job.

Sincerely,

Young, fat and successful

submitted by /u/chubbyexec
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source https://www.reddit.com/r/loseit/comments/g6cd9w/young_fat_and_successful/