Hey Guys Jake here. I want to share my story with you.
I have always been an overweight kid and have been made fun of through out my high-school years. At first I didn't really care much but as I was growing older I started to care more about what other people think of me.
When I was about 16 years old I slowly began to realize being out of shape was holding me back, I was self conscious and missing confidence and I had to do something about it. So I started doing research to figure out what the best way is to lose weight and get in shape. I wanted be like one of the cool guys in my school who seem to be popular, good looking, surrounded with people, none of them were overweight like me.
I wanted to have a girlfriend but I didn't feel worthy enough because of the way my body looked (I know silly). I was truly ashamed of the way I look and I would never take my shirt off, I would refuse to go to vacations during summer time because I knew that implied being shirtless and I wasn't willing to let anyone see me the way I was. Following this realization I started to eat less (not knowing anything about nutrition) and lost about 40 pounds but I felt like I looked even worse. I had the look of what people call novadays "skinny fat". Which prompted me to look into the specifics of nutrition/fitness and I did tons of research. Following this period I have tried countless diet/fitness regiments. One of the very first ones was the cd series called "Insanity" which is composed of HIIT training done at home for about 45 minutes and prescribes a diet that is of 1500 calories (basically starving now I know what is right/wrong.).
At the end of the program which took about 2 months, I have built some muscle and lost a lot of fat (about 35 lbs.) and I thought that I finally reached my results. I looked good, I felt good and I was attractive to many people, asking me how I did what I did and that I looked great. However, little have they known as a consequence of fast results and extreme measures I have messed up my relationship with food/exercise for good. I was starving myself even before having started this program (a lot of yo-yo dieting) and after the program, I have lost my intuition when it comes to food and I was either going to make myself workout everyday for hours and eat very little or I was to gain all the weight I lost back. I have dealt with a period of bulimic symptoms at this stage where I would try to resist eating but surely enough give in to the temptation sooner or later then feel guilty and make myself purge. And I would feel terrible about what I have done and be left feeling ashamed. I thought that there was something wrong with me because no one I know had this problem, they seem to be just fine regulating their hunger and maintaining their weight without going to the gym everyday or starving themselves.
After having realized, this was not sustainable I got into bodybuilding, I learned about bulking and cutting and the cycles of putting on weight and losing. It was refreshing to be able to eat again with the goal of gaining weight but I didn't know what I was doing so I would gain more fat than muscle. I wasn't triggering the right response in my body to signal muscle accumulation and all that was happening was fat gain with little to no muscle growth. I didn't know the right exercise that would yield muscle accumulation, I was wasting my time in the gym but I didn't know any better. I did that for couple years too where I would gain weight and then lose it again and find myself not getting anywhere with my body composition. I was doing something wrong and I didn't know what. I settled for the reality and accepted that the success in this are wasn't for me, I just didn't have the genes for it. I even thought that I had loose skin that was the culprit, I wouldn't look good no matter what I tried, there was something fundamentally wrong with me.
What I was doing wrong knowing now what I know, is that I was inpatient and I wanted results fast. I didn't want to make it a lifestyle, I just wanted to get it done right away in the fastest way possible, taking things to extreme. I didn't know how to exercise, I would overexercise and I didn't know how to lose weight, I knew how to starve myself which made me face eating disorders and made me lose muscle and ended up with me looking skinny fat. After years of mistakes I decided to know everything there is to know about nutrition/fitness and I was determined that I would get it right this time, not rush but make it a lifestyle, take things slow. I have read all the books out there about nutrition and fitness and I have tried to pinpoint the most credible sources. I have done ketogenic diets, paleo, intermittent fasting, bulletproof diet.. you name it. and they were successful to some extend but they still implied I had to restrict myself in some shape or form and this was not healthy for me psychologically considering I had a background of binge eating and bulimic tendencies, they would all end up with me setting myself up for an episode of overeating and erasing all the progress I have made.
Know I know. There are no methods, there are no magic pill and there are no easy fixes. Now I know that there is only moderation and the process that works. The process that will work for everyone and anyone and it requires no starvation, it requires no extended hours in the gym killing yourself. Now I know it is not how long time you spend in the gym but what you do in the gym. It is simple and it is only governed by simple overarching principles. However, it is not marketable because it is not flashy. It has been in front of me all the time but I wasn't willing to listen because I thought to solve any problem, a complex strategy was necessary and extreme measures need to be taken, boy was I wrong. My own ego failed me because I wasn't willing to be convinced that the solution could be so simple. I thought I was a hard case! I realize now, I'm nothing special, no better or worse than anybody else. There are only outcomes governed by processes and no one is exempt from this fact. There are no hard cases, there are only principles that are governing our outcomes.
Now I know that the best solution to any problem is the simplest effective process that can be sustained indefinitely. It is however, not a fast process, it requires discipline and it requires consistency. Unfortunately, discipline and consistency doesn't sell. But cutting out a complete food group and doing fasted cardio.. that sells, HIIT sells, fasting sells. Complex solutions appeal to human brain, we love complexity and we are more easily persuaded by the complex processes.
Having made all the mistakes and knowing what works now, I know this is utter BS. Whenever you hear someone telling you, promising you results with a complex, convoluted solution I'd suggest you run away. We live in a world where the best solutions are always the ones that are simplest that are implemented over a long period of time and executed with consistency. Fitness is not an outlier, nutrition is not an outlier and you unlikely to be an outlier. The solution is simple but execution requires you to make a commitment, you need to make it a lifestyle and embrace moderation and be patient with your body, with yourself and trust the process. Celebrate the small wins and walk towards your goal slowly but surely until you get to it. Forgive yourself for making mistakes knowing that you will and be patient with yourself, get back to it right away.
I have been a software engineer for years now and have been leading a very busy lifestyle but conversely I have no trouble keeping myself fit and healthy. I feel great in my own skin and look forward to going to the beach and taking my shirt off. The methods that I come to find that works does not require hours of commitment and it certainly doesn't need you to sacrifice you favorite food groups. I eat out regularly and cook deserts at home without any worry of becoming overweight.
It would be dishonest for me to say that once you have a body that you are comfortable with, all your problems go away, that is not true. I still deal with number of issues including self esteem but I'm far better than I was years ago. Fitness and my self body image is simply not a problem anymore and I can focus on other things in life that are important. But it is still important and everyone should strive to be at the very least healthy.
I'm now helping people that are in the same position that I was years ago to show them the process and help them reach their physical/health goals. It requires no extreme measures, it requires no elimination of major food groups, it requires no 7 days a week cardio and it certainly doesn't include any treadmill BS unless you like it which how you could enjoy it escapes me. It is 100% congruent with a busy lifestyle and doesn't require you to sacrifice your priorities. The process is simple but the execution requires commitment. Right process + commitment X Consistency will get you the results.
I'm actively looking for those that can relate to this post that would like guidance. The best solution to any problem is through finding the people who have achieved the outcomes that you'd like to achieve and learn from them. This is what I have done myself and I would encourage you to do the same.
I have made all the mistakes and I'm here to help you to not make those mistakes and teach you the methods that are simple that would yield the most of the results with the least amount of investment. It does however require you to be willing to let go of false beliefs and embrace simplicity. It requires you to be committed and to be persistent. If this sounds like you comment below and share your journey, where you are now, if you are having challenges currently I would love to know and I'm open to any questions. If you can relate please let me know.
Thank you for taking the time to read, I know it's been a long post.
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source https://www.reddit.com/r/loseit/comments/ebbmfx/jake_here_my_journey_from_fat_to_lean_ps_long_post/
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