TL;DR: 10 months postpartum and 9kg heavier. Frustrated. Some questions at the end.
Before getting pregnant, I was really proud of myself for losing 15kg over the course of a year. I'm in my mid 30s and had just ticked over to an obese BMI before I started losing weight. My motivation was strong. I knew my age already put me at risk during pregnancy, so I needed to at least get the weight down as much as possible beforehand.
During my pregnancy, I diligently counted calories based on doctor recommendations by trimester. This wasn't hard either, since I could barely hold food down for the first 4 months. And I wanted the baby to get good nutrition in utero.
A week after giving birth via emergency c-section, I was back to my pre-pregnancy weight. But my body didn't look the same. Of course. A baby had literally been cut out of me. She and I both could have died.
Ok, all of this is expected, I told myself. I'm breastfeeding, so it's ok if I go over my maintain, right? I'm stressed, it's ok to have sweets. I'm tired, it's ok to eat more. I'm awake at 2am, at 4am, and every 2 hours after that, sleeping for 30 min here and there when I can. It's ok just to have another bowl of cereal. Better make use of the downtime I have.
I kept counting calories.
2 months later, my body looks exactly the same as it did 2 days postpartum. My stomach sags over my underwear more than it did at my heaviest before I got pregnant. My hips hurt when I sit too long or sleep on my left side. I start mentioning at normal baby checkups how depressed this makes me. A midwife tells me body changes are normal. She briefly touches her own belly and says it often never goes away. When I bring it up with my GP at 4 months, she startles and asks, "Do you have an eating disorder?" I don't talk about it again.
At 5 months postpartum, I've gained 3kg and I'm exhausted. At 6 months I start the baby on solids. I'm up 5kg. Frustrated, I stop tracking my calories and start tracking the new foods I'm introducing to the baby instead. I stop weighing myself.
Now It's a new year. It's been nearly 10 months. The baby is now on 3 solid meals a day, accepts most all foods, and is learning to sleep through the night. My excuses are gone. I step onto the scale and I'm 9kg heavier than my pre-baby weight. My old clothes from before my 15kg weight loss journey aren't baggy anymore. And worst of all, I'm HUNGRY. All the time.
I'm sad. I'm angry. I feel like I got to enjoy my weight loss body for only a few months before it was gone. My belly is some sort of cruel joke to me. I look 6 months pregnant. Maternity clothes fit really well.
I want to lose the weight. Again. A few questions that I grapple with:
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What sort of strength exercises should I avoid, given that I'm still breastfeeding and the hormones relax all my joints and cause hip pain? Are crunches, twists, and the like still off the table like they were during pregnancy?
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Will my belly really stay this way forever? If so, what's the point?
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I'm hungry. I can't sleep. If I don't sleep soon, I won't get a chance for a full sleep cycle. I want to eat something to help me sleep but it'll destroy my calories for the day, what do I do?
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In the summer, when the baby was younger, we could go for walks for hours and she'd sleep. Now it's cold outside and she only naps in her bed. I can't go on walks anymore. What alternative do I have?
Does anyone have any advice? Thanks for listening.
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source https://www.reddit.com/r/loseit/comments/rul0em/post_baby_weight_gain_and_body_woes/
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