So. Four years ago, I was 72 kg. I'm 169 cm, so that was still overweight at 25.2 BMI - which I actually didn't care about; I felt awesome, and I'm naturally built like a little bear, so...yeah.
Then I met my now ex (a 'functioning' alcoholic) and lost my job. Basically I spent the past four years financially destroyed, homeless (except for my ex's place) and trying to 'cure' an alcoholic.
There was a lot of stress, frustration, depression, and never leaving the house, because he might drink.
So now, four years later, I find myself at 104 kg - BMI of 36.4
Fun part is I still don't feel too bad; no aches and pains, no joint issues, I can get up stairs and so on - but the MAIN thing I struggle with, which suggests my body actually isn't feeling well is that I've lost any and all semblance of a sex drive.
Sounds like a stupid thing to be bothered by, maybe - but I'm newly single and I can't find ANYTHING that turns me on. Which, to me, says my body isn't feeling well. It's not psychological - I am happy to say I know myself very well. Just like I know that I got fat because I had no life with my ex. All I ever did was sit around guarding him - and so food became my "happy place" that I did "for me" - stupid, but true...
Funny enough, he was VERY happy to provide food and candy - I think he gave that instead of giving trust and intimacy, which he had cut off from because of both previous trauma, and the alcoholism.
In any case, now I'm single, employed, and by friday I will no longer be living in my car. So it's time to sort myself out.
My first goal is 93. Then 82. Then 71. And, finally, 60. I have no time line though, because frankly I don't know what is realistic...
Battle-plan is OMAD, 1600 kcal max, MUCH less carbs, and dancing (the only excercise I actually enjoy - I aim to add yoga and pilates to that. Both look enjoyable, so should work fine)
Yeah. Hi everyone :)
[link] [comments]
source https://www.reddit.com/r/loseit/comments/ez4bqh/day_1_long_way_to_go/
No comments:
Post a Comment