We had a small get together this year, just my brothers, my parents, and I. My dad made a lovely roast beef dinner with all the fixings, and everyone had one plate. It was a great day, and a delicious meal. I was the only one to go back out and take a second (albeit small) slice of roast beef. I wasn't too ashamed of this, one of my brothers and my dad had piled their plates high with food, so I figured a second small piece wasn't that bad (my plate hadn't been small, but it wasn't crowded with food either). We had dessert about 25 minutes later, a real treat in our family - carvel ice cream cake! I had a large slice and was tempted to go back for another, but decided against it. I volunteered to clean up everything and as I did, I fixed myself another plate of food. I had originally meant to take it home with me to eat tomorrow, but I ended up eating it then and there. My family was gathered in the living room, while I wolfed down a second plate of semi-cold dinner after a hefty serving of ice cream cake! I was beyond stuffed and I knew I shouldn't have done it. My mom asked why I was in the kitchen so long, and I just mumbled something about not being able to find proper lids for the tupperware. I was so ashamed, full, and sleepy I wished everyone a merry christmas, and went home. Luckily everyone knew I have a busy day tomorrow, so no one questioned why I was leaving a bit early.
I'm starting my "new years diet" tomorrow (I'd say now but I'm done eating for the night), there's no point in waiting until the new year, I need to make this change now. It's going to be so hard for me as I've had success once before with losing weight and I ended up with an eating disorder. I became completely obsessed with counting calories and eating "healthy" that I was eating under 900 calories/day and just sleeping when I wasn't eating or working. I'm currently at my second highest recorded weight: 230 lbs. I'm 5 ft, 27, and female. I'm aiming for 1300-1400 calories/day.
ETA: I use the word diet loosely. This is going to be a lifestyle change, not just a lose 40 lbs and go back to eating chips and drinking soda thing. I want to be better.
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source https://www.reddit.com/r/loseit/comments/efq5vs/christmas_dinner_shame/
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