Hi! Some background: ever since I started running 5ks (on and off for the last 6 years) it's been a goal of mine to do a half marathon. I finally decided to commit to it and I'm signed up for one in April. In addition to running 6 times a week I've also been dieting, as I know it'll be much easier for me to run carrying around less weight, so I've gone from 239 to 216 in a few months.
My sister noticed I've been losing weight and she said "I really hope you're doing this for yourself and not because you feel like you need to to find someone." I've been single for pretty much of all my life (I'm 29) and as much as I haven't made dating a huge priority (ie sought it out on apps) I'm very outgoing and social, but nothing more than flings have ever panned out. Of course part of me is doing this for me -- like I said running a half has been on my bucket list for years -- but another part of me does want to have someone to share my life with and I do feel like my weight is probably the biggest reason why more people haven't showed more interest in me, so that's what I said. She wasn't happy to hear me say that and she wants me to love myself and think I'm beautiful the way I am etc... the truth is I do think I am attractive as is and recently had a physical where my bloodwork and everything came back as healthy and normal, so I guess in a way I am losing weight in hopes of attracting others. I know she's coming from a good place and just wants me to be happy with myself but it's really hard when I do feel like I love myself but nobody seems to pursue me romantically and that just leaves me with doubt. And then I'm made to feel shamed for just being honest about it, because it's not the answer people want to hear. I guess I'm struggling because I do genuinely like myself but sometimes I honestly feel like without someone else's validation it's meaningless or that I'm failing in some way. Sorry this post is so all over the place. Just hoping someone out there gets it.
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source https://www.reddit.com/r/loseit/comments/f35m9e/losing_weight_for_others/
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