Fat and miserable

I'm fat and miserable. I'm 41, male, 177cm and 106.8kg. I've got two great boys 4 and 1, and a wonderful wife and a steady job in health care (NHS).

I live a very sedentary life. And I eat and drink too much. Because of my job and years of lurking here and in other places I know what I need to do to loose weight, and honestly 9 months of steady work would see me into a healthy BMI range.

But I cannot find the discipline to stick at it. The work just feels demoralising and I procrastinate like a... Well a lot.

I do have reasonable health, at Christmas I did two 5 mile walks at about 1hr 15 each. And about once per month I do some voluntary work clearing local woodland of scrub.

The rest of the time I'm either at my desk or in my car or recovering from work on the sofa. My job is demanding in a number of ways and needs a lot of unpaid overtime with a long commute on top. And having two small boys means my wife (who doesn't currently do paid work) is also knackered at the end of the day. So the house is usually a mess, the boys both still sleep in with us so my sleep (always poor) is worse and our diet is not great. Today we had Indian takeout because the chicken she bought 3 days ago was too far gone to eat.

I've been planning on joining a gym, liking the idea of an easy to get into routine but also not wanting to spend the money. I also think that given my general state of fitness just a bit of body weight fitness or routine from YouTube would be much more cost effective - although this last one does mean fighting the kids for the TV and tidying up the trainset and toy cars etc first.

I am sick of being fat and unfit. I'm sick of sweating and poor sleep, I'm sick of being bloated. I'm sick of my jackets not buttoning up nicely because my tummy is so big. I'm sick of my moobs.

I need help being disciplined with diet and exercise. I can't rely on my wife to help as she has enough else to do already and as this evenings supper shows when the chips are down we get take out.

I can batch cook at the weekend, but meals need to be transportable and eatable while driving (no crumbs - perhaps a shake? We have a blender).

With the exercise I don't know. I want to get stronger I want to be fitter and more flexible and I want to go harder for longer. Also I want to see my own cock when I look down.

I should say my GP started me on ramapril about 3 months ago as I have high blood pressure. My BP is in the 120/90 range now with a pulse of about 75bpm.

I have a single speed road bike and some hiking and camping gear that I don't use but want to.

Any advice or support gratefully received.

Tomorrow I have to go into the office and tell a colleague they can't have some IT equipment that they should by rights have. And that 'the system' means they get to go without. As do another dozen or so people in my team.

Thanks for reading this far.

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source https://www.reddit.com/r/loseit/comments/eyzmzh/fat_and_miserable/