TW?: The way I express myself regarding my weight and my bodily image might not be "healthy" so I'm sorry if I make yall feel uncomfortable about yourselves. Now to it.
I don't think my brain fully comprehend just HOW bad things are for us. I'm almost 100 kg, at 5'3. That's basically the double of what I should be weighting. I've ruined my body, and soon my health too -weirdly enough, so far so good in that matter-. I look like shit. I do my hair and makeup and dress up for what? to barely pass as a normal person. I have my body size so normalized, it sometimes freaks me out to see thin girls in the street and calculate how many times would they fit in my frame. I've tried so many times to lose weight and I seem to always fail, and I'm not gonna make excuses: I fail because I love food. I don't eat just because I'm anxious or whatever, I ate this much because I love sugar, and fried shit. And my brain can't seem to have enough but my body WILL soon have enough. Sometimes my knees hurt! And also I don't wanna be jabba de hutt, I wanna be princess Leia so bad. I wanna be pretty-ish again so bad. Being unattractive is veeeeery inconvenient!!! I just feel like I'm on a loop of despair, like I don't own my meat suit anymore, and that makes me feel so weak and dumb. Anyway, week 1 of CICO in. Wish me luck.
Ps: I had already lost like almost 30 lbs in just 3/4 months but I quit and gained 20 back so 🥴🥴
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source https://www.reddit.com/r/loseit/comments/qktzcz/is_it_always_gonna_be_this_hard_dumb_short_rant/
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