Today was the first time the scale has shown a number below 100kg. I'm still a fat bastard, but I guess this is a milestone of sorts. I can remember when I first found out I exceeded 100kg. It was the fun experience of getting to find out in front of my classmates at school. During a PE class in Year 9 (so I'd have been 13 or 14) we had to do a bunch of things that included recording our weights. Given I was easily the largest in the class when it was my turn to get on the scale everyone pretty much gathered to see. The number ticked over 100kg and you can be sure that elicited a reaction from everyone, including our teacher (nothing mean was said, it was more about the tone). It isn't like I didn't know I was fat (2 years earlier I was in the 80s, again I know thanks to a weigh in at school), but to have a whole extra digit compared to all my peers, even the teacher was...shall we say, fairly embarrassing. Suffice to say it wasn't my favourite moment at school.
Well, that was over 2 decades ago. When I started this process at the end of August 2019 I was 169.6kg, though given old photos and some clothes I was probably 10 - 20kg heavier in the early to mid-2010s. It has taken nearly 72 weeks to get here, though I might have been here 21 weeks ago if I didn't take breaks along the way. So 50 weeks of CICO and tracking, just short of a year. Not going to lie and say I'm satisfied with that, I'm not. Even if I know that taking those breaks (though one went on 3 weeks longer than it should) were probably for the best not only for me, but for others in the house, patience is not something that I'm known for. That said I'm also lazy, so half-arsing my way here is also very on brand.
I wasn't really in favour of even acknowledging this "milestone" let alone celebrate it. In fact, how I address this entire process is a bone of contention. The common view is that I should be more pleased and proud of what I've done. I can't do it because it is disingenuous. I have closed the stable door after the horses have already bolted. I only acted after getting a chronic illness caused by my weight. For me regardless if I'm a normal weight or obese I've still thrown away around 10 years of my life expectancy. My actions are at the core, futile and I can't ignore that. Not that I can tell friends or family that. They don't shouldn't be burdened with my weakness. I deserve the fate I now have, I earned it with over two decades of my own decisions.
So here's to being under 100kg. I was going to say you came 21 weeks late, but in reality it was years too late.
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source https://www.reddit.com/r/loseit/comments/kuazz1/first_time_out_of_triple_digits_in_over_2_decades/
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