TLDR: Don’t fall for the hype, nothing will cure you overnight. It takes long term work, but that work doesn’t have to be as difficult as you think. Aim for average and keep on improving until you’re happy where you are.
A couple years ago I had a horrendous relationship with food. All too often gorging myself on chocolates, pasta, crisps, sweets - anything that was sweet or salty. I put on weight like it was a full time job for a while, and occasionally would restrict and eat ‘perfectly’ until craving took hold and I had another binging session. The feeling of helplessness, guilt and shame were all consuming.
And honestly it scared me. Why couldn’t I get full? Why did I eat until I felt sick, wait a bit and then eat more? Why couldn’t I stop?
But now - it’s all gone.
I can be in a kitchen and not wrestle with myself on if I should binge or not. I can eat ‘in moderation’ which is something I never thought possible. Food is no longer guilt. I even have normal hunger cues!!! Not just sudden panic and a NEED to eat, I even sometimes feel to lazy to eat!! Truly mind bending things for old me.
So how did I do it? By trying every single bloody ‘trick’ until I finally put the work in and accepted I needed to rewrite my relationship with food.
And this probably isn’t what you want to hear - I too once loved seeing those before and after posts and reading how the OP only had to ‘drink 3L of water a day’ and their cravings vanished, or they simply went paleo/vegan/no sugar/no processed food and that solved them.
Sure there were things that gave me ‘a-ha!’ moments, but they were pieces of the puzzle, not a complete solution. No amount of ‘eating slower’, ‘drink a glass of water every time you want to binge’ or any other quick fixes changed me like I thought it would. I now believe that a lot of the quick fixes and really just coping strategies for in-the-moment urges rather than a long term solution to feeling out of control.
Focussing on fixing my relationship with food and understanding what triggered my binging sessions is what cured me and has made me able to eat ‘normally’ after so long. There is something truly liberating in being able to enjoy food you love with no guilt or shame and still being in control.
So what does fixing your relationship with food look like? For me it looked like trying to eat like the average person - so a typical breakfast lunch and dinner - without worrying about what my weight did for a bit. Over time I found a way to gauge if a meal was going to be good or not (for me: does it have protein, carbs, fat and fibre). Later I realised I very very deficient in certain nutrients to started eating a bigger variety. Did I binge still? Yes, lots. Especially in the first few months, but gradually I stopped getting the same release as I gave me. One day I get tempted to, but just decided not to - and that was it. Did I gain weight? Yes (5kg) but it plateaued and then started going down on it own accord.
All these little tweaks have resulted in stress-free diet that keeps me healthy and had kept my weight stable even over Christmas with NO effort on my part. I just eat what I feel like and it now naturally will be something with balanced protein, veg, carbs and fat. I don’t even crave sugar any more and have gone off sweets and cake!
So yes, this was rather long. I just had a bit of a reflection on how far I’ve come and I wanted to say that there IS hope and you mustn’t give up!!
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source https://www.reddit.com/r/loseit/comments/ktfse0/a_message_for_anyone_struggling_with_binging/
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