I feel bad for some reason for even feeling this way, but has anyone found the extra attention overwhelming? Especially from the opposite sex?
I’m female 24 and went from 280 lbs and overweight all of my life, to 138 lbs and maintaining for about a year now. I’ve been in a relationship since I hit the 200 lb mark, so I haven’t had much time or reason to go out and show myself off, for lack of a better phrase.
Recently, my partner and I have decided to explore some different aspects of our relationship, this includes exploring with other people, not trying to be tmi, this is going somewhere. Anyway, since we’ve decided this I’ve been on some dating websites and have went to bars with a couple women. Of course, most men assume these women to be my friend and not my date, and mind you this is one of the first times I’ve been dolled up in this kind of scenario since losing the weight.
The amount of men who threw themselves at me, derogatory comments, try hards yelling in the corner, and that 50 year old drunk guy who’s clearly there every night making gross comments.. and man was it, disgusting.
Not only that, people OGGLE me. This, in turn, has made me hyper aware that I am now more desirable, which in turn means my risk as a woman for sexual assault is higher. I told my partner it’s tough to be aware of that sometimes because so many years I was the fat friend in the corner, I was never on the predators radar, nor did i ever find myself in uncomfortable situations like that. Now the dynamic has changed, and ironically I have a fairly petite figure so it’s obvious I couldn’t put up much of a fight. I’m deeply saddened that I have to feel this way. I want to show this new body and confidence off, modestly of course, but instead I have to live in fear because of it.
It’s mortifying and so depressing that I have to feel this way now. On top of that, men reading this, please learn some respect and at the very least some better tricks. It’s gross and uncomfortable and unbelievably overwhelming. It’s one thing to pay an attractive person a genuine compliment, but when you can’t keep your eyes above my neck when speaking to me, please, just go away.
Sometimes it’s nice knowing I’m attractive, don’t get me wrong.. but now anytime I have any interaction with the opposite sex, it’s almost always followed by ulterior motives to try and get with me or unfortunately something much worse.
Anyway, I know I’m making generalized statements about men, I understand not all of you are like this, and I’m sure there’s women who come on strong too, but this has just been my experience so far.
I remember for years how my cheerleader friends would all say how annoying it was to be the hot girl in school, and I was like how? I’d love for people to be chasing after me, little did I know the grass isn’t always greener on the other side.
Please, everyone, just stay safe out there and don’t be a douche.
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source https://www.reddit.com/r/loseit/comments/qafdyu/kind_of_weird_vent_here/
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