F - 30 - HW: 470 - LW:345 - CW: 364 - GW(end of)21:300ish
Posting on a throwaway because I feel like this post will rustle some jimmies a bit. It's not my intention at all. These subreddits have been a huge help.
TW: <1k calories - Could potentially be triggering to people due to low-calorie discussion.
Medical background incoming also <3
Okay so. I'm not new to this. My highest weight was 470 last year. I got down to 345 in about 8 months of moderate-hard work, then I wobbled back to 380 after a hard couple of months. After some therapy, medication, and serious attitude adjustment, I'm leveled off again and back on track. I have a serious problem with binge eating. I've talked to a counselor who has experience with eating disorders and my therapist. I managed to switch jobs, I'm counting calories again, and I haven't binged. I didn't even binge at a July 4th party (six people all vaccinated, first social gathering since covid. I was thrilled). I ate and drank under maintenance on those days as I planned. I am feeling good and motivated and actually happy.
So here's where I'm torn. I'm on a few medications. Three of them suppress my appetite. I have been on topiramate for around 6 months to aid in reducing binge episodes and to help with migraines caused by my thyroid issues. It reduced my migraines incredibly and it's forever here to stay. I am on 150mg wellbutrin in the morning and in the evening. This was a switch over from Contrave which I had adverse reactions to. I do however love myself on this medication. The last addition has been a huge help. My doctor took the time to listen to me about my issues and agreed to start me on adderall. I worked my way up to 20mg in the morning. I don't take it in the afternoon because I just don't like the anxious feeling at night. So far, I feel really nice. My bloodwork on everything came back great last month, so starting on getting more regimented, I actually feel better and more like myself again.
With my job and being busy, I'm just not hungry now. I feel guilty over not being hungry. This isn't how I grew up. My coping mechanism for years of trauma was always gorging myself on food until I was sick. Over the past few weeks, I've found it easy to stay under 1200 calories per day. On some days, like today. I'm sitting at about 950 (with 170 of it being a white claw prompting me to write this haha) and I'm just not hungry. I take my medication, multivitamins, and I think I've had around 5 liters of water. (Also I'm PMSing so there's that.)
So my questions are:
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Is it okay that I'm just not hungry?
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Do I have to force myself to eat up to a calorie limit, even though my body has plenty of fat stores for years? (Exaggeration, but you get what I mean lol)
Bariatric diets pre and post-WLS often are sub-1k calories. I am not rushing to lose weight or anything (I want it off like the rest of us, but I'm realistic)
I finally feel free from food and I don't want to feel guilty over it. I don't feel as if I'm restricting myself in any way, I'm just not hungry. I've been eating what I want to, and making healthy, filling dinners for my partner and myself. I just also feel guilty because of that stigma now. I have 100% been in touch with my doctor throughout the whole process. I can text her at any time. Please don't think I'm going it alone. I just would like some level-headed outside takes. Thanks frens
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source https://www.reddit.com/r/loseit/comments/okhn51/morbidly_obese_question_on_calories/
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