I have been chubby/overweight my whole life. Never really to an extreme, but I was always the bigger girl. I was never necessarily comfortable with my body, but learned to live being 20-30 lbs heavier than all my friends.
Fast forward to my early 20’s, I finally started packing on the lbs. I am 5’8 and through college was around 180-190, but after I graduated, moved towns and had hardships with jobs I ballooned up to 220-230. I just wallowed in self pity and filled my unhappiness with food, I had no real idea for how to stop... so I just kept eating. This seriously started to impact my ambitions with my career because I work in a very physically intense field.
I started working at a new job that lends itself to being healthy and fit. If you are not fit in my career, your world is just that much harder. I have always known this, but never attempted to be fit... because it seemed hard. About 3 years ago I finally had that epiphany moment when looking at a picture of myself, and though “oh shit... this is getting bad”. I noticed my bed had started to make an indent on my side of the bed, and that rolling off the couch was actually hard.
I’ve tried to lose weight before, with mild success. So I began doing the things I knew would work. More exercise, less food. I started running. Instead of 2 servings for dinner I would have 1. Instead of having a giant breakfast with eggs and toast, I skipped the big meal. I cut out most of the junk food. I began to eat for the environment and my body. More plants!!!
I ran a 10 mile race at 200, and a half marathon at 185! I really do love to run now. My job got SO MUCH EASIER, and I feel like I actually am good at my work. Once I hit my “target weight” of 180, I had to reconsider what the hell I was doing. I have never been below 180 in my adult life, and wasn’t really sure how to portion... when to eat.. how much. I still felt addicted to food, and that I had to be obsessed with what I was doing with my food intake. I attempted IF to try to get down lower.
IF led me to be thinking about food literally ALL THE TIME. I wasn’t very strict, but since I wake up at 6 AM, not eating till 12 or 1 was hard because all I could think about was what I was going to eat. Sometimes, I would just eat constantly from 1-4 because I was still trying to fill that morning void. It seemed to work when I stuck to it, but overall was not for me. I am losing weight to better my life and lose my addiction to food. Not to created another weird ass habit.
I just reintroduced a late morning light breakfast (rice cake with PB, and fruit). Now when it eat about 9-10, I literally don’t think about food until I am hungry again. This honestly has changed so much for me. I finally feel free!!! I taught myself how to eat when I am hungry without binging, or going overboard. I still think about food all the time. I stopped mentally counting my calories after every meal, because I only eat what my body tells me I need, and I don’t eat shit food. If I do eat shit food, it’s in moderation (a few chips here and there, bits of chocolate).
This post is cathartic to me, and i just wanted to maybe share something that would help someone. This has been my road to personal food freedom, I hope you al can find what I have found.
Today I am 165, and people keep telling me I look so thin! I am not necessarily trying to lose more, but am open to my body changing to my habits. I work really hard at work and I think some serious body recomposition is happening (in combination I hike/ run on average of 3-6 miles a day). I just want to write what I had eaten today, and I think of today as an OK day.
I am not keto, only carb conscious I am dairy free I attempt to eat mostly local farm raised animal products It’s fruit season here, and there’s so much beautiful fruit to eat. I am indulging in the good stuff!
Wake up: 6AM
Breakfast : 9AM 1 rice cake with PB Banana Handful trail mix
Lunch: 12:30 PM Small bit of leftover steak and salad 2 hard boiled eggs 2 figs Strawberries + plum Half bar of chocolate (SO GOOD AND MADE ME SO HAPPY)
Snack: 4-5PM Rice crackers, sesame sticks, pumpkin seeds, orange
Dinner: 7:30PM Cabbage salad Brown rice Stir fry veggies 2 tempura shrimp (Costco)
Dessert: 9PM Non dairy ice cream 2 vodkas ( I am a creature of comfort, cannot give up my night caps!!!!)
TLDR; I lost the weight. I am happier.
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source https://www.reddit.com/r/loseit/comments/i3yyf9/i_figured_out_how_my_body_works/
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