It takes a lot to post this. I went through a super depressed phase back in 2018. I was depressed to the point of not eating and just dragging through each day. The only happiness I found was in the gym. I spent minimum of 5 hours a night in there, and in 3 months, I went from 260 to 190 lbs. I found happiness again. I could shop for clothes and be comfortable. I was comfortable in my own skin. I am 26 years old (24 then) and I had done something I never thought possible. I made it under 200 pounds for the first time since early middle school. At some point from then, I started to gain. And gain, and gain, and gain. Until I was back to where I was at 260 pounds. The depression has come back. The things that used to work, doesn’t work anymore. The dieting, the exercise, nothing works to get this stubborn fat off. I lie to myself when the scale says 250’s and say that most of it is muscle weight. But I know that’s a lie. I’ve asked friends for help, but at the end of the day, I can’t put all of my problems on them. I’m in a dark place now, I feel as if I’ll never get back down. I hate how I look and I hate what I’ve become. I see videos that friends have recorded and all I can do is be so disgusted by how I look. The depression keeps me up at night and makes it hard to get through the day. So I’m asking for help here. Reddit has answered nearly every question I’ve ever had. If anyone out there knows how to make meal plans, exercise plans, whatever I need to fit my body, please. Please help me. I will pay I will do whatever I have to do, but I’ve got to do something. I will give you any information about my body and build that you need. I don’t know how much longer I can dwell in this selfish self hatred. It’s ruining me. The pictures I included were my before and after, my smallest, and the mirror picture is where I’m at now. I’m asking from the bottom of my heart, please help me.
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source https://www.reddit.com/r/loseit/comments/ief504/a_final_plea/
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