Depression is a fucking beast.
I went through manlift training today and was completely embarrassed when my lead ranger had to help me make the harness (that had fit everyone else) bigger because I was too fat to fit in it. I know I’ve gotten fat, and every time I get on a piece of equipment or an airplane or walk up some fucking stairs or anything, I’m reminded of it.
I’ve been battling depression for as long as I can remember, honestly. But in the past couple of years, I’ve been losing the battle. Running used to be my therapy, but then when I moved to the valley of Texas into terribly hot temperatures, that went down the toilet. Then the stresses of management and the sedentary nature of the job got to me, and I got into a new routine.....and... well, long story short, here I am... I have been doing the best I can for my daughter, but I have not been doing my best for me.
This is fucking embarrassing to post, but damnit, I’m going to make a change. I’ve used my status as a single parent with a demanding job and being stretched too thin (how ironic) as an excuse for far too long. I’ve GOT to make a change to improve not only my health, but my quality of life. So it’s happening now. Hold me to it, y’all. Keep me accountable!
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source https://www.reddit.com/r/loseit/comments/et4pmq/today_sucked/
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