I've been fat my whole life. I was born fat. I lost 40lbs last year and I'm still fat. Being fat and the emotional baggage and habits that come with it are so core to my life experience that it feels like even if I lose another 40lbs (plus the 15 I've gained back since hitting my low weight) I'll still look the same.
You'd think losing that much weight would make it seem real, but nobody has said anything about my weight loss. And I know some people probably noticed and said nothing, but it wouldn't matter even if they did. Because I feel no different. I feel just as undesirable and depressed as I always have, and it feels like I'm going to be this miserable no matter what, so why even try? Why do less of the one thing that makes me truly blissful (eating) for just more pain?
I literally cannot imagine myself not fat and it's exhausting to motivate myself to do something I can't conceptualize. "Eating better to lose weight" feels as stupid as "lick doorknobs so you can fly". Like it's pointless and uncomfortable actions for impossible results...
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source https://www.reddit.com/r/loseit/comments/pw96vp/being_skinny_seems_fake/
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