14F; 5'7"; ~140 lbs
I know I'm in the healthy weight range for my height, but I'm trying to lose around 15 lbs and get more fit just so I can feel better about my body and improve my health. My mom doesn't know I'm trying to lose weight (and not my dad, either, but I don't really spend much time with him), but I don't want to tell her because she'll probably suspect me of having an eating disorder. My twin sister struggled with anorexia from 2017–19, and since then my mom has become overly watchful of me; she has asked me on a few occasions in the past if I was "trying to secretly lose weight like my sister did" even when I was eating a normal amount, and she gets suspicious of me whenever it looks like I'm trying to eat healthier, like if I get whole wheat bread or if I order oatmeal instead of a huge stack of pancakes at a restaurant. Because I'm not overweight, I feel like if I try to explain to her that I'm trying to lose weight, she'll just get panicked about me potentially having an eating disorder and make me eat more.
I used to not really pay attention to my health, so I often overate and got myself the reputation as "the one who likes (junk) food." Because of that my mom always tells me to eat a lot, like by forcing desserts on me and buying tons of snacks for me specifically. Right now I'm trying to discreetly throw away what unhealthy snacks I can, just because I don't want to cut down on regular meals, which I can't throw away (I eat them together with her) and that are more nutritious. (If I didn't have to throw food away, I really wouldn't, but I feel like it's the only way I can decrease my caloric intake at this point.) However, even in regular meals—especially when we eat out or get takeout—and sometimes when she makes me eat snacks together with her and my sister, I end up eating a ton because of pressure from her, and in particular foods heavy in sugar and fat.
I've been tracking my calories for a little more than a month, and I recently started working out. My daily average net calories are around 1370, which is a 430 calorie deficit from what I would need to maintain my weight. I often go way over my daily goal, even into the 1700–2000 range, because of my mom, and sometimes end up just wanting to skip breakfast and lunch the next day, which I know is really bad. I don't have a scale I can use to measure my exact weight, but I've been taking weekly photos and can't see any difference from when I started to now. Any advice would be insanely appreciated!
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source https://www.reddit.com/r/loseit/comments/f755lx/mom_wont_let_me_lose_weight/
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