I posted this on the anxiety sub, but this is also how I feel in terms of losing weight. I know 6 pounds isn’t a big deal, but it’s everything to me in this hard time
F/25/5’4/SW:275/CW:269/GW:120
Next step: Go down to 265~
For the past month, I’ve been having all kind of symptoms from extreme acid reflux to weekly anxiety and panic attack. Recently everything seems to be going bad for my family. From my father’s death to getting kicked out of his insurance to worrying about my mother and brother’s deteriorating health to worrying about finances and how to survive, I’ve been so exhausted that I convinced myself that I’ve been having a heart attack for the past couple of days. My brother works part time and only makes $400 a month. My mother cannot hear and has constant chest and shoulder pain. And she became even lonelier and isolated after my fathers death. And I guess right now I’m going through the depression stage of grieving. Everything seems so hopeless. I’m also in debt to student loan and I never held a job before.
But today I am trying to make some changes. I got accepted for Medicaid, I’m going to look for therapists who accepts Medicaid, tomorrow I’ll get the process started for mom. I’ve been obese my whole life. I went from 275 to 269 now. It’s giving me more motivation to continue. And for the first time in my life, I actually got a call back for a job interview that seemed to go well. I’m keeping my fingers crossed
I’ve been so anxious and irritated the whole day. At 1 am, I decided to search up yoga for obese people on YouTube. I did 10 minutes of that and did 10 minutes of walking. To my surprise, I felt so much calmer. I took a shower and now I’m laying down on my bed, with my chest pain almost gone, and feeling a strong desire to fight against all the shitty thing that happened to me so far. I’m trying so damn hard to change my life around and live a life my father could be proud of. It’s so difficult, it’s so hard but it’s the little things like this that gives me motivation and hope. I don’t want to lose to my depression, at least not without a fight.
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source https://www.reddit.com/r/loseit/comments/gre7rz/lost_6lbs_feeling_motivated/
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