This summer was one for the books, but not for the reasons it should have been. So I worked my ass off for the body that is standing in this earth. While I wish I could say I’m proud of it, I just view it in disgust. I was I. Therapy for about 8 months and antidepressants for 2 before quitting both because I was still depressed and I thought it was better to save the money on other things than two things that weren’t helping.
After the shit year everyone had in 2020… 2021 was supposed to be a reintroduction to me and the new person I had set myself to be. In December I found out I had loose skin and to this day I’m in denial. It was actually he one thing that I was trying to avoid when loosing weight. I took my time, hydrated, did creams, did fasting, did microneeding… but I still ended up with it. I thought maybe I just have to build muscle and so increased my weight training and still my shape was the same. I snapped in March and it has been downhill since.
Second year of university is starting and so a lot of my friends are going on vacation since we all work and are vaccinated. One of my friends is in Dominican Republic, the other is is Orlando, Florida all with their old school friends and boyfriends. I’m home alone working my ass off to get this skin removed saving as much as I can. I feel desperate for change, a sign in the right direction. I’ve gained back 10 pounds because I gave up taking care of myself because it seems pointless when all my hard work amounted to depression and terrible body image.
I wanted to go to the beach in confidence, travel, save for a new car, to move out, start a social media account for inspiration and thirst traps.
Shit dude these 15 year olds look better than me, I’m here still thinking I’m obese after loosing 71 pounds and hating my life that I worked to change. I want my consultation but the doctors aren’t responding nothing seems to be going in the direction they need to be.
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source https://www.reddit.com/r/loseit/comments/owtvwe/the_things_ive_missed/
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