Hello,
Let me start with some stats for context - M29 5’11 SW 280 CW160 GW?!?!
I’ve been losing weight now for 3 years through a combination of diet and exercise - one thing I’ve definitely learnt is that there is no magic weight loss bullet folks. Taking care of yourself in terms of what you put in and how you use it is literally what it’s all about.
Things I’ve learnt - 3 mindset changes:
The biggest mindset change I’ve had is an actual love for exercise - in particular running in total on my weight loss journey I’ve run 3466 miles now in 3 years, 1596 of which are this year since January. At first when I started running 3 years ago I couldn’t do more than 60 seconds without wanting to collapse and I genuinely googled if it was possible to break your legs if you tried to run whilst being obese. It HURT! However, now the time I spend running is one of my favourite ways to spend time, it’s done so much for my confidence and social life. The time I spend running I use to think and contemplate. It can genuinely lead to running epiphanies like for example it was time to leave a toxic relationship that was not conducive to my weight loss efforts and later that I had met the person I want to spend the rest of my life with and I should propose. Anyway minor segue off topic...
The second biggest mindset change and this I’d say I’m actually still fairly new at and in the process of adapting to. That is, thinking of food as fuel. Trying not to let emotions dictate my eating habits. Like a lot of people on this sub I have issues with emotional eating and impulse control, I really enjoy cooking, eating and all things food. For example all of the accounts I follow that aren’t friends on Instagram are food accounts. I spend a good deal of time reading and collecting recipe books. My favourite evening/date night activity is going out to sample new restaurants for dinner. I love food! So the idea of it as just fuel and trying to desensitise myself and detach from all that emotion and happiness I associate with food has been really tough. I guess what I’ve learnt is food is so ingrained in every human culture that it should be celebrated. Just it’s important to remember it shouldn’t be ALL be celebrated ALL the time. I had a very dangerous view that I had to eat everything I made or ordered. (clean plate club childhood, anyone?) Essentially, just remember that it’s okay to overeat and consume the foods you love. Just not all the time and just not to excess. Remember at the end of the day it’s all fuel for your body and like any fuel it has a varying energy density and quality. Think of it like this - high fat and sugar food is like heating your house with fossil fuels, really energy dense and easy to acquire but runs out quick and burns fast vs high fibre and nutrient rich food (see; fruits and vegetables) is like chopping down a tree and using the wood to fuel your house it takes energy to digest (cut down the tree) and burns way more slowly and is less energy dense pound for pound you need more of the tree to heat your house. Weird analogy maybe, but it’s how I think about it - both viable fuels but worth considering your choices.
The final mindset change I consider important enough to talk about/mention is just awareness over obsession. That little voice in your head that says I want another biscuit with my cup of tea but I really shouldn’t is healthy but on occasion during this journey I’ve let it take over to an unhealthy level. For example the voice says you’re going out this weekend better run 15 miles or you can’t go. Breakfast this morning? No thanks, it’s (insert colleagues name) birthday and there will be cake at work. Just eat the cake, go out, run but stay consistent with majority good choices - but by denying yourself of something or considering yourself unable to eat unless you’ve reached some arbitrary burnt calorie goal. Then you are, in my humble opinion, starting to dice with obsession. Now, it’s important to keep your goals in focus of course but, there is a fine line. I’ve definitely been to the obsessive side plenty on my journey.
Questions I still have:
Will this loose skin ever go away? (Probably not...)
Do I now have enough definition in my jawline to rock a moustache?
If I stop running through injury, will I gain all the weight back?
Will I ever not be slightly startled when I see myself in a shop window as I walk past and think, where did that guy come from?! Then realise it’s me...
Will I ever stand in front of my bathroom mirror and not feel the need to lift/grab/stretch the pouch of loose skin that hangs 360° around my abdomen and just accept that this is my body and I’ll probably never have definition despite being at 14% body fat currently? Does it even matter? Is this a good problem? Why doesn’t it feel like a good problem... maybe I should step on the scales and see if my stats have changed? (Seriously, this has been tough to come to terms with)
Do people treat me better now because I fit societal norms or am I just a happier more confident person and therefore better received?
Why do I feel a combination of both sympathy and resentment (this troubles me) for those that are obese but not trying to change. Probably because I’m projecting myself onto them right?! I don’t really resent them I resent what I used to be?
What is my goal weight? Honestly I don’t know, for now I’m pretty happy with a goal range of 158-162 maybe this year I’ll start properly lifting and that will get higher. For now I think a 4lb buffer is a healthy thing.
Anyway, thanks for taking the time to read this. So many posts here have helped me find motivation or tips, so I hope this helps someone else!
Before and after: Before and after picture
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source https://www.reddit.com/r/loseit/comments/jk5xwh/weight_loss_from_280lbs_to_160lbs_things_ive/
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