And the answer was as depressing as i thought it would be, at 320 lbs. This is equal to the heaviest I weighed in 2015. A year ago I was 280, and a year before that 255.
A lot of things have happened in that time. I found out my girlfriend was cheating on me so we broke up, and that definitely took a toll on my mental stability. My grandmother passed away. I moved into an apartment by myself due to problems with my other living situation, and immediately after that covid hit and most of my friends and family made it very clear they wanted to see everyone virtually instead of in-person for events.
I've become embarrassed to go outside and see people. Most of the time I see my coworkers at the office, and my family a couple of times a month. I see my friends online and every once in awhile will see them in-person. But I always feel apprehensive when invited to events, or unmotivated to go do outside activities due to how heavy I've become. The thought of seeing someone that I haven't seen in a year brings a lot of anxiety because I know how much worse I look now. Last time I decided to go for a walk outside, a runner passed me by and whispered "what a fat fuck" under his breath and my thought was "yeah u right," lol.
I'm also running into new problems now that I'm in my 30s with my weight. I realize now that being this big is more than just a cosmetic issue; there are real problems that will come if I don't get this under control soon. My brother got a niece last year that I'd love to see and show her all my favorite outdoor hobbies and sports, but being this big will definitely put a damper on that. I need to get it under control.
Anyways, I didn't want this post to be a pity-party but I just wanted to share where I'm at. Yesterday I went to the store and bought a ton of healthy groceries (I've been living on take-out all year) and I found a nice walking trail nearby that I'm going to visit after work. I know what I have to do, and living a healthy lifestyle while living alone is going to be a huge challenge for me to overcome. But I want to stick around this sub while I do it.
Hope you're all having a great monday!
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source https://www.reddit.com/r/loseit/comments/mtzqk5/today_after_a_year_of_eating_junk_keeping_to/
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