Sort of posting this for myself, as I use my Reddit account as a sort of “journal,” but figured this could be a friendly reminder for people on a similar journey.
I’ve been doing intermittent fasting and currently in the best shape of my life. I’ve had a really solid 4-5 weeks of consistent healthy eating.
Tonight, I grabbed dinner with my sister. We had an awesome, awesome time and I absolutely love when I get to spend time with her.
So we’re out at this fish spot in my city, and I get a crab/sushi gazpacho that was delicious. Comes out, virtually no carbs that I can tell other than the veggies. All good.
Then I order my entree. I see a menu item that has raw calamari, mussels, etc., but has the word “bucatini” after it. I don’t see any mention of pasta in the description, so I figure it’d be another “platter” of seafood with virtually no carbs other than the healthy ones like veggies, and/or maybe the sauce the food resides in.
Well, not only did I not know what a “bucatini” was (or meant), but the dish comes out and it’s probably 10% seafood, 90% homemade Italian pasta.
I’m sitting there just like, “f*ck...”
But you know what, I eat it, and I eat 90% of it until satiated. Feeling guilty already, I down my second tequila water with lime because again, “diet” and “health,” right?
Actually... right. Yes, “diet” and “health.”
Only then the waitress asks me if I want some of their homemade banana bread cheesecake for desert.
My good Lord. I couldn’t resist. I paused, and simply said (in a joking manner), “give me all of it.”
My sister laughs, I laugh and mutter another “f*ck” internally. It’s like I just wasn’t in control at this point and just along for the ride. But I was excited for the homemade banana cheesecake that the waitress so elegantly presented to me with her words.
Then it comes. My God. This thing looks literally unreal. Had to have been 900 calories.
But I eat it. I take my time, but I eat it. And all of it.
Funny thing is, I felt guilty. Sorta, but not really. Just enough to be 50/50 about eating it versus not eating it, because I knew deep down that I’d been good with my “diet” up until that “point.”
But now, as I sit here on my couch watching some irrelevant baseball game, I find myself realizing that situations like those are simply inevitable. There will always be banana cheesecakes offered to you at random points in time, and at the worst points in time.
Could I have denied it? Of course.
Would it have taken extra willpower? Of course.
Was it worth it?
Fuck yes it was. It was fucking delicious. And I loved it. Every bite of it.
However, with all of this said, I’m going to get back on the horse tomorrow. Black coffee and water up until 4/5pm tomorrow where I’ll get back on my IF pattern and get my body back into rhythm.
But even then, I had somewhat of a breakthrough realizing that it’s OK to indulge every now and then. And frankly, I’ve had nights that were way, way worse than this one. Nights where I’ve eaten everything in my pantry. And I mean everything. I’ve had 7-8 thousand calories nights in a span of an hour or two.
This was nothing. I simply enjoyed a homemade banana cheesecake, and learned that bucatini is a type of pasta, and a type of pasta I’m actually not terribly interested in.
I guess, these nights are OK to have. I enjoyed it with my sister, and with some delicious food. I’m done eating for the night. Time to get back to it tomorrow.
Cheers all.
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source https://www.reddit.com/r/loseit/comments/mwlfhi/ah_got_put_in_a_tough_situation_tonight_need_to/
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