16F, 5’3, 120 lbs This post is going to be a mess but here I go, don’t know if it’ll get removed. So it was going great; I lost 8 lbs on keto, was seeing significant progress, doing intense exercise. Then I started to eat at maintenance. I did this for a week; afterwards in an attempt to start losing again, I tried to create a deficit. It would start off well, then I would have cravings at night and eat till maintenance. I would have occasional binges, too, convincing myself I deserved it. But a few overindulgences led to more binges, then excessive exercise. I was tired. Tired of overeating then trying to compensate. Before anyone says anything no, I don’t have a history of binge eating disorder, and my binges weren’t extreme. Today I was tired in the morning so I didn’t exercise, decided to take a rest day. And it started off well. But now it’s evening again and I find myself haven eaten an additional large slice of watermelon, 1 chocolate protein bar and 6-7 homemade granola bars. Idek how many calories but today i was already over my deficit by 450 cals and i guesstimated and the total chalks up to about 2,950 cals. Over the past month I probably gained 2 lbs. I envy people who don’t obsess over meal times. After breakfast i think about dinner, after dinner i think abt tomorrow’s breakfast. there’s just no end. I can’t focus on anything else. Even if i’m not hungry i’ll stress about not being hungry bc I can’t justify not eating a meal. Like it’s just food but it causes so much anxiety. I talked to a therapist last week for one session but it was honestly a waste of time. I’m just so tired. this post is all over the place so sorry idk if this is even allowed. i keep telling myself tomorrow is a new day but i’m so. tired. tldr; i’ve become obsessive and it’s taking a toll on me mentally can anyone relate? ;((
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source https://www.reddit.com/r/loseit/comments/hb8kyb/im_obsessed/
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