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Thursday, June 11, 2020

I have wasted the last year

First up I really don’t know if this is the right place to post. I am really struggling today. June of last year was a big one for me. My marriage broke up, I had my third baby, and was getting ready to move out of the home we shared with my parents (we were saving for a house) and my sister and her family (who were in the granny flat out the back, recently moved back to our town). So basically I had lots of people around me, and support for me and my 3 young kids.

After the baby was born I weighed 80kg (176lbs) which was close to the lowest I’ve been in years. Well today I am almost 100kg (220lbs). I remember at 89kg (196lbs) and then again at 92kg (202lbs) promising myself that that was the highest I would ever get. I read the divorce subreddit a lot and I read of people getting into shape, bettering themselves etc and I wonder why I couldn’t do that, why instead I ate my feelings every single day. It’s now gotten to the stage where I don’t want to leave my house to see people because the only clothes that fit are track pants and big jumpers. I only had like 5kg to lose a year ago and now it’s 25kg (55lbs).

I would give anything to go back to a year ago and do things differently. I’ve cried a lot this year and honestly I am dreading my sons first birthday coming up because it’s just a milestone for this shit year where I’ve gotten depressed and fat.

33F CW 99kg GW 75kg (165lbs)

Edited to add in pounds equivalent to weight

Edited again to add that I would not change the fact that my marriage ended. That 100% needed to happen, just sad timing.

submitted by /u/chippypip
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source https://www.reddit.com/r/loseit/comments/h7du6e/i_have_wasted_the_last_year/

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